AWARENESS - WHO IS THE PERSON IN THE MIRROR?

Re-connect with your-real-self

 

Good day, Sneža here, your Personal Coach in SCM team.

I was recently asked by a client “How do you see that?” (that they are primarily air-water regarding their dominant energy) and I simply said “I don’t know”. Sometimes I need to ask some questions to make sure, and sometimes I just see it.

The gift of seeing more than others almost got me killed. No, not really my gift of seeing, but the fact that I was too blunt to see that some people would prefer to stay away from their mirror for as long as possible. And that some of those people would do whatever it takes to remove that “mirror”.

I’m very grateful for that lesson.

Surviving that misunderstanding was another gift that I was given. I wrote about that some more (to be honest - only as much as I feel safe and comfortable to show at this point) – in my book “Rebirth”.

After that accident I’ve started to pray to be shown something only when that particular information can be of service to someone’s good (and that always includes the good of all).

I also started working effectively on re-connecting with my-real-self and that got me where I am today, 10 years later.

In reality, not all people want to meet their-real-selves. But I was shown, and it means that it will be for the good of you all reading this to show you the same – that everyone (without exception) meet their-real-self in this life before leaving it.

Some people waited for the death-bed to take their mirror.

Why?

Usually because they were holding on to some hurt that they couldn’t / didn’t want to show and let go of/forgive, or because they thought of themselves to be better than someone else, so they were stuck with their judgement, grudge, jealousy, or because they thought that showing vulnerability, insecurity, fear.. was a sign of weakness, and they didn’t want that to be shown.

Let’s be honest – we are all everything!

There is nothing in any of us humans that can’t be found in another.

(What are the thoughts / sensations that you’ve just had? J Are you shaking your head thinking about some person you don’t like and saying to yourself “oh no-no! I’m not like that!”)

What’s different is how these same characteristics are scaled and combined within one personality in the moment they decide to take a look in the mirror.

I usually suggest to a client: “Imagine yourself as a tree. (planted in a separate basket)” We all have the same type of branches, only positioned differently and developed differently – some longer and richer, and some shorter and noticeable only to “a sharp eye” or someone who knows you well.

But they are all there!

So, what do you see when you take a look in your mirror?

 who is the person in the mirror? SCM New Recovery Approach

You discover what branches you’ve been feeding better and exposing more to the Light.

And some of those may surprise you!

Why?

Because they present quite the opposite of what you truly want and value.

How could that be?

Let’s say that you were growing up next to another tree (your sibling for example) whose branch of self-confidence is very tiny, so they developed a strong mocking branch that serves for hiding and protecting of the tiny one. So you start first by imitating your older sibling (that’s natural part of every human development – to learn “living” from those who are around you and who lived before you), and then at some point you start really “pumping up” your mocking branch, because your natural energy is opposing one, so you “fight” with your sibling, you push them back, you reject their “attack” and your mocking branch gets stronger and stronger.

And now, as you are standing in front of your mirror, it is clearly showing you that - an over-developed mocking branch. And you don’t want that! It’s not who you are! It’s not what you value. You respect every life, you feel in your big heart that we are all connected, you LOVE uplifting and supporting others! And you can see that people don’t even trust you when you show them your supporting branch. Now you know why! Your mirror clearly shows that you have neglected it, while the mocking one is way over-developed for your taste!

This is THE CRUCIAL POINT IN EVERY PROCESS OF CHANGE – SEE THE TRUTH of the present state.

Without that it is IMPOSSIBLE to make a LASTING change. Because you might even get to your point B, but carrying the same issue that you had when you started from the point A. Then you come to realize that it wasn’t the environment, it wasn’t that job, and it wasn’t that thing that you wanted to have or to make happen! It was SEEING clearly, just like looking at your own MIRROR, what the issue was. And dealing with it.

No need for cutting your branches off, no need for hurting yourself (not anymore!) – quite the opposite – just giving more care to the opposing branch will settle the matter.

You might wonder – “Why do I need to look in the mirror? Can’t that process of change happen naturally?”

It can. And it will.

But at what cost?

There are very few of us who don’t run to the doctor when some illness occurs, but who take a look in the mirror first and ask themselves “How have I helped this to happen?” and “What can I CHANGE right now to make it better?”

You know what is natural?

That the processing of the data in the library of your subconscious happens million times faster than in your conscious. What does that mean? It means that, when someone says “That’s who I am! I can’t change it!” what they really say is: “I have adopted this kind of response before I was 7, so it’s stored directly in my subconscious and it’s my automated response.”

How do you change anything that is stored in your subconscious?

For example, the person that we have described with an over-developed mocking branch – How do they stop mocking or running away from the person that they love who is crying in front of them? How do they come to realize that instead of mocking they can choose to hug their beloved? How can they choose “hugging” in that instant when “mocking” is running from their subconscious million times faster?! No way.

The only thing they can do is to take a look in the mirror and gracefully recognize an over-developed mocking branch. That will bring their issue from subconscious to the conscious level. And ONLY ON THE CONSCIOUS LEVEL WE CAN MAKE DESIRED CHANGE. Once they see that the mocking branch is over-developed, they can CONSCIOUSLY CHOOSE to start feeding the supporting branch through creating and implementing concrete practices for desired development of their supporting branch.

What I see with many clients is a great struggle at the first step – to take a look and see what’s in the mirror. That’s where people get stuck in addictive behaviors, in avoiding the truth, in hiding from it.

Tell yourself:

the only way to change what you don't want is to see what that is

Think about it for a moment – you open the old fuse box and there is just one fuse that is not working properly, so you need to change it if you want the lights back on. Can you change the one that is not working if you don’t want to see which one is that?

You can go around the bush (or below an over-developed mocking branch) – but that bush (or that branch) won’t change if you don’t STOP, take a LOOK at it and DECIDE how to shape it, to CHANGE it in a way that shows more of the REAL-YOU.

And what happens if you decide to let faith, Nature, karma, God (.. or however you like to name it) take the course of your life where it’s “meant to go”?

It will lead you directly to places, people, situations, problems .. and they will all have the same purpose – to point back at you, at those parts of you that you don’t want to see, accept, trust .. and that are CRUCIAL for you to BE who you ARE in this life.

When you are disconnected from your-real-self, the only way for you to proceed is toward re-connecting. It can be very forceful, painful way, or it can be more gentle and fun – when you decide to participate consciously in the process.

Yes, there are people, who decide to choose the way of re-connecting through death. Once they get a clear knowing that it will be shorter, less painful, more convenient way for them – they decide to go that way. It usually seems to them that they have to walk again through all the trouble that they’ve been through, through all the lies, all the pain of that path that have distanced themselves from their-real-self. And it truly LOOKS so to them, but it’s not so in reality. The point of re-connection is not on that “disconnection path”, but inside of them, in all the parts of their body, in all of their brains – in head, in heart and in gut – in their thoughts, in their feelings in their instincts. Mending broken connections, creating new pathways that connect them with their REAL beliefs, building trust in their own ability to see and feel their-real-self in this life – that’s the “road” that they need to travel in order to heal.

And some people might think that it takes a lot of time and a lot of work.

No.

It takes WILLINGNESS.

Willingness is enough for creating space where new knowledge should enter. It’s like a question that removes presumptions and expectations and opens the person enough for some new insight to settle.

And how fast do you accept anything that is so YOU, so TRUE for you, so LIKE you?

Immediately.

There is no opposing of the real-self to something that is pointing out any part of it. It feels like the real-self took a glimpse of itself in the mirror and said “Yep! That’s me!”

NO PAIN – ONLY GAIN!

Who might feel some pain, or better yet, some discomfort in that moment when a new insight lends on an open area created by willingness?

Only Ego, that’s right. Because it is presenting some picture that doesn’t match the one in the mirror.

And what is Ego?

Your new suit for the day. Nothing else.

You need to put it on because you feel much more comfortable in it and your brain can rest more - because when you present it in the morning with the set of prepared “who we are and what we do” ideas, your brain can switch more to automatic responses and “enjoy” the ride. Your ego also gives you more smooth way of relating to other people because they can "take out" faster the adequate response to something that is clearly presented to them.

So, your Ego is GREAT!

BUT!

It doesn’t serve you well if it doesn’t fit you!

If that “who I am and what I do” is NOT the real-you, but some distorted image of the real-you (shrank to fit the smaller frame of your sibling, or too large for you to fit the unrealistic expectations of your parents, or made in wrong-for-you colors to match their own unmet needs...) than that ego is NOT YOUR EGO. And just like the suit that doesn’t suit you – it has no use for you, it can’t serve you.

You can fix it, or make a new one.

And it can’t take more than a week to get a new, better suit, right?

re-connect with your real self in 7 days

NOTE!

Once you get it, you can start wearing it only for special occasions – when you are alone in front of the mirror admiring the “new-you”, when you are in front of someone you deeply love and respect (and they will be glad to see YOU!) – and then, gradually, also in front of the other people who liked you more in that “old-you” suit.

You can give yourself time to adapt to that feeling of comfort “in your own skin”.

(for many of us who have spent a lot of time in an uncomfortable suit, getting rid of the idea that “pain/discomfort must always be present” is a HUGE challenge)


 

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